Experience

Tara 2005

When this whole mess started in 2005 I was an idiot. In 2003 I had a friend (Karl Zwonnikoff) who pinched the cat in the dark with a very dodgy girl named Tara. We had a fallout about that given that he was Primarius of Kanniedood and in that year his mother a medical doctor herself talked to me about Tara.

After this friend stabbed me in the back in 2004 and me being admitted to Tara, I jumped to conclusions on why this happened. It was only in 2011 when she sent me an email after I believe her daughter told her about what happened at RMB that I realised how dumb I was on this matter. Given the memory of him and Tara and me being in Tara freaked me out a bit. Anyway back at Tara now in 2012. It's a lot better than it was back then.

 

Sterkfontein

One would think that sick people, no matter what illness they have would be treated decently.

It is true, I've had my gripes with Psychiatry, specifically because I've had multiple diagnosis and even the diagnosis that are the same list different symptoms...

All these happenings make me think that Psychiatry is not very scientific at all...

This however is not what this story is about. I have been admitted to Sterkfontein two times and once volunteered myself in there...

All three times I have seen things that would make human rights commission people turn in there graves.

Assaults and mistreatments.

All of these could be stopped by just applying the right management to the institution.

Making nurses and doctors there aware that the culture of the institution is not one of mistreatment and people who don't abide by that will not be tolerated.

Sadly I don't see this happening in the near future and for now, patients who have been medicated or sedated will still be sleeping the drugs off on a hard cold concrete floor. To make matters worse and because we live in an age of experimentation I suppose. Some of these drugs have vicious side effects. Spasms and muscle contractions are not uncommon. This on a cold concrete floor.

Winter and summer...

Understand, it's not a case of beds not being available, more a case of nurses being lazy.

And yes, for the people reading this thinking of Elliot Rodgers and what he did. Maybe thinking that people like that don't deserve rights...

Just as he was sightly off his rocker, and by slightly I mean all the way, when he shot people for no reason at all in Santa Barbra...

There are people who are to scared of the world to put foot outside there houses. To such an extent that they can't go to work or on a date or anything...

If we are a civilised society, I suppose those peoples rights should also be protected... People like that should not be left full of mind altering drugs on a cold concrete floor...

Sterfontein (2012)

At the start of 2012, a very bad year for me, I admitted myself to Sterkfontein as I went thought a very bad time in both my personal and professional life. This would be the last time I would trust the people there. While there I met a Paranoid Schizophrenic, Tammie. Even though most people are scared of people with schizophrenia. I find there take on life very interesting. I'm not a doctor but it would seem that they have a couple of things in common. It's as if they experience emotion more intensely. Some can function in the outside world and lead a normal life and some just can't and need constant supervision. Personally I don't think they are more violent than other people I think they can be more honest about what they went though if violence occurs. Lets face it all murders and assaults aren't committed by them and not all of them are violent.

Anyway getting back to Tammie. He wasn't that functional. A very paranoid person, always scared of being killed by gangs. In hospital he always told us that he liked it there because he felt safe. He did a couple of other things that irritated some people but he wasn't violent just always busy, sometimes aggressive but never violent. One night he drank water in a way one of the nurses didn't like. The nurse said he was spitting in the water, grabbed him, slammed him up against the wall and kicked his feet from under him causing him to fall on a concrete floor.

Complaints were launched by me on this matter but as far as I know nothing was done about it. The complaints were given to the doctor of the ward. Dr. Brummenhof. It occurred to me that just replacing the bucket of water would have been a tad more humane. But I suppose not all people see it that way.

Sterfontein (2010)

I've been thinking of school friends lately. It occurred to me that they remember someone that hasn't existed for more than a decade. Not since he lost a friend next to a road close to school... For years after that I didn't even go to that area. The reason I'm thinking of this is the reaction I got from my best friend at school when I told him what goes down in mental hospitals.

Believe me its sad when you realize why some of the people there ,are there. Anyway we were talking and he, awhile back was very close to the church He told that he wasn't sure anymore and I told him that, all things being equal he had less worries than me. He asked me why and I told him this story...

I was in an acute ward in hospital and they brought this guy in... He was aggressive and well... By this time I had seen pretty much everything the place had to offer and wasn't to bothered by him that was until he stole an old man's, who I knew, tobacco. The old man was very upset and I told the new guy to give back what he took. He started telling me that I had demons in me and that he sometimes could be possessed by Jesus Christ... He said I shouldn’t worry and he started something that seemed like a seance.

I watched him for about 5 minutes or so and when he asked me if I was feeling better, I told him that Jesus didn't give him all the information. I was Lucifer her on earth and I was a demon he can't drive me out or anything like that it would never work.

Anyway the guy got more aggressive. And the old man never got his tobacco back. I think my friend thought this was a made up story but this really happened.

Leratong (2012)

With this whole ICT-works / SITA mess I ended up in hospital. Long story really. Not the story I want to tell here though. While there I met a Rastafarian boy. Round about twenty or so. Diago his name. He is addicted to dagga and while suffering withdrawal symptoms started crying one night.

One of the sisters there, Ernst, felt it good to assault him with a belt one night. This was reported by me to both Doctors and one of the matrons but nothing was done to the staff who was responsible for it. This type of thing always scares the hell out of me. I can't believe people cover for each other in such a way. This same hospital changed my diagnosis when a Dr. left there and new Dr. was appointed. They claimed that they had no records of me being there in 2007. This was done by a staff member not a doctor though. So one never knows.

All this being said, I don't think that the people who work there have the easiest jobs. At on stage in July I saw patients tearing pages from a Bible to make home made smokes. That day I felt like killing some of them as well.

Engagement (Sterkfontein)

For most of us the act of getting engaged is a pretty important thing... Something sacred that is remembered for a lifetime...

Now it is no secret that I have had various visits to Sterkfontein, mostly due to stubbornness and recently something happened that reminded me of why I am fond of Wendy Cain

If your ever unlucky enough to get side railed and end up in Sterfontein make a note to look at the hands of all Psychologists and Occupational Therapists. You'll soon realise that they are all engaged.

Statistically speaking this is very improbable, if calculated it comes to far less than 0.14%, given that there are more than 7 Psychologists and OT's in the hospital.

Now I suppose people will try and make the argument that these girls feel unsafe and that is why they lie, but I don't think so.

Wendy Cain did this until I told her the odds of all of them being engaged. Then even after a patient made inappropriate remarks about her and I told her to ware the ring she wouldn't.

Anyway if people feel afraid in there careers, I suspect it is time to change careers. You can't say someone sufferers from a symptom if people who are supposed to treat him or her alienate that person in such a disrespectful way...

Dr. Marsay / Dr. Liebenberg

This story played out at the end of 2010. I was in hospital and was being treated by a somewhat naive very charming lady, Dr. Marsay.

Back then Dr. still claimed that I was delusional about hacking on corporate networks so the day I got admitted I brought with a printed email to crimestop with files visible on this site as proof that they were not to clued up on how things work in the corporate world.

The first or second time I saw her Dr. Marsay, with all her charm rubbed me the wrong way by making the statement. "IT has nothing to do with this." Combine this with all the assaults that happen in that place on a daily basis and a very explosive situation arose. I walked out on her after the statement and she felt me to be psychotic. She prescribed drugs for this and the barbarians at Sterkfontein make sure that I took it...

I kept my cool, never getting aggressive, even when threatened physically, right before Dr. Marsay went on maternity leave, there was another doctor who saw me. Dr. Liebenberg... He asked me all about what had happened. Whether or not I had problems with any of the staff, how I felt about Dr. Marsay and all sorts of questions like that...

After being moved around a couple of times in hospital, this Dr. Liebenberg told me that Dr. Marsay had treated me inhumanly... I found this quite laughable as I have had dates where females have treated me worse than she did.

What also bothered me about this situation was that even though Dr. Lienbenberg sounded caring in his presentation of ideas to me he never once took the time to take a look at what I was thinking or doing. Rather he would preach to me and tell me what I was supposed to think. He and Dr. Brummerhof had one thing in common. They were very opinionated about me and people who had dealt with me to that point, but never once did they get the information to make scientific calls based on evidence.

For the above stated reason I don't trust either one of them as Dr. Marsay's words were one of the factors considered in me creating Medisis

Painted Black

Having spent time in mental hospitals, varsity and the corporate world, I suppose one could say, I have seen extremes of all kinds.

Personally, I don't really see a difference between some students actions and corporate people. The funny thing is and what most people don't realise is, I don't really see a difference between Psychiatrists actions in mental hospitals and there patients either.

Take this situation I had well have with a Psychiatrist.

In 2011 I found myself in Sterkfontein, now whether I should have been there or not is still strongly up for debate as the same evidence around hacking events in MTN is the reason I ended up there.

See if you actually dare report criminal behaviour in a corporate company, the police put you in a mental hospital as I suppose it's bad for the country and the economy. I mean really... How many corporates are caught up in scandal and why is that? The same people who cheat on there spouses work at those companies...

Anyway, Ralf as I tauntingly call him, was in charge of treating me at a point in 2011. Mental hospitals are not corporate companies but believe me all sorts of entertaining hair raising things happen there as well if you take human rights seriously.

Psychiatrists don't really seem to take note of these things. Golden rule of thumb, if you ever unlucky enough to end up in one of these places, no matter what they tell you or what you read on the posters there... Don't think you'll be treated as a human. Your lower than that...

Back then before I met Ralf, I tried to take a stand against nurses assaulting patients. That didn't work out to well...

So basically after I went on a hunger strike because of patients being assaulted, I was told this was part of my psychosis and given a ton of mind altering drugs. This was done by injection under duress as I basically told them that until the assault issue was addressed I didn't care for there ideas...

After a stalemate on this situation I was transferred to Ralf, After about six weeks of ignoring me he took it on himself to fill in an official government form, where he stated that my ideas are both dangerous to myself and others.

At that point I was a tad upset maybe because history has shown us that when it comes to mistreating people, well that never ends well...

I suppose he wasn't willing to retract his statements and I wasn't willing to sign off on them so I ended up on the streets in the winter of 2011. This after I created Medisis in front of him and launched two web sites. He never looked at any of the three.

In September 2013 I logged a complaint against Dr. Ralf Brummerhof. The complaint was simple. When I was under his care he informed me that he lied on an official SASSA form to make sure I get money from the government, he stated this to me after I informed people in the hospital that I could not accept money as everything Ralf wrote on the form was fabricated...

On the 11th of December 2014 I mailed info@hpcsa with a complaint stating the above.

This mail was forwarded to their legal department on the 17th December.

As December are holidays and nothing really happens in that time I didn't make a very big fuss on not hearing from them.

I followed up with the HPCSA in January and they had me re-log the complain as separate issues on formal forms...

This wasn't a issue, but it is worth noting that the original mail, dated 11 December was forgotten by them...

Anyway after re-logging separate issues against all Psychiatrists who treated me pre and post Ralf Brummerhof, the HPCSA informed me that if I didn't know the initials of a doctor who treated me, there is noting to be done. Even though I can give them a time frame and location of the Psychiatrist.

Now at first, I didn't mind this to much, I mean there is something to say for complete information... But thinking about it afterward, no doctor in a hospital introduces him or herself on a first name basis. So I think there may be a problem in the system...

Continuing the story, Ralf Brummerhof supplied quite a few Psychiatrists with complete names and there complaints were accepted. Also, I knew one or two other Psychiatrists names...

Unfortunately I suspect, I'll have to do some leg work for the others...

The mail sent to me as acknowledgement stated that as soon as the complaint is opened and in the process of being addressed, Someone from the HPCSA will contact me with a second letter of acknowledgement.

To date a month has gone by and of the seven complaints accepted, I received one of these letters... The last time I enquired about this, I received a blank mail from a Ms. Kwele. That was blank. I find this highly frustrating and very unprofessional as the question has to be asked... Has there been no movement on six complaints for a month? The people who are complained about in this situation, play God with countless lives and there is strong evidence that points to unprofessional behaviour in this case...

How can nothing have happened and these Psychiatrists been given an extra month of time?

Update

It is 18 months later and I have been given the run around by the HPCSA. The original complaints were forgotten by them and when I followed up wanting to know the status of the accepted complaints in January, I was told that my complaint was about Ralf Brummerhoff and not the doctors the complaints related to. Note some of the communication in the zip file relating to this. here

Does this relate back to my graduation?

Because of the implications, I have decided not to post my graduation photo, yet!!! What I will state is back in the day, both at University Johannesburg and Die Randse Afrikaanse Universiteid (UJ before the merger with Wits tech). Old House committee members from the house Kanniedood, were known as Psycho...

What Ralf Brummerhof wrote to the H.P.C.S.A.

Findings of the H.P.S.S.A. on the matter

Facebook 2017

At the beginning of this year, I had a bit of a fallout with someone I know on Facebook...

This guy and I haven't spoken for going on 16 years. The last time we spoke was at the end of my first HK term, and yes we served on the same HK and yes it's about a girl.

In my opinion he violated a oath or something when he went and posted the below video of me on Facebook. As it does not represent what happened in the correct light...

This would be an attempt to explain what is happening there and yes, it's probably against the law but students students don't really care about such things while studying...

The very first thing one should note about this is, the only people who are even supposed to know about it were the people it was done to and they are also the only people who were allowed to do it. When elected HK, it was not just a democratic process. As HK you were going to be responsible for the next set of first years arriving on campus, Part of becoming HK meant that you wanted to test yourself and see if you were good enough to deal with 300 drunk, sex obsessed 19 year old and could get them though a year at varsity without any incident... Few people really succeeded at this. I tied twice...

I may be jumping the gun though... For no RAU / UJ readers. RAU had a very solid house structure... If you wanted to get involved in drama / sport or even just social with girls on campus, you were associated with a house... All the houses on campus had a different culture... There were Romans and Greeks and French and Italian, and then some more far fetched ideas that mutated over the years...

Becoming Kanniedood HK

After the election results are announced on the Friday. All new HK members are sat down by there committee from the previous term and they are given a hair cut... One should note that none of these guys ever studied hair dressing and for some or other reason, there was only ever a clipper... Needless to say you end up with long and short hair and chunks of hair missing and hair that should be gone visible...

After your new hair style has been sculpted, the whole HK takes a walk around campus, always being friendly and helpful to all they come across... If the old HK get feedback that the houses name was not dragged though the mud in this long walk, the new HK are allowed to shave off all there hair.

Friday comes to an end and... Saturday arrives. New HK are supposed to report to the house promptly at 5pm. On arrival you are told that you look thirsty and you are given a liter of water to drink...

One by one, new members are called into the meeting room, all money and phones and pretty much anything of value is taken from you and you are given a overall to ware backward for the, I suppose right of passage... After clothes have been changed, you were blind folded and cable tied and led to a chair somewhere on campus... You are left there with Psycho (Old HK), while all new HK go through the same. Of course Psycho get board, so they play a few games. This is what is visible in the video below and please, even though the one guy has a cricket bat, no one was hit with it...

After all HK are out on chairs, at about 9pm, All new HK are put into a bakkie(truck) and driven out of Johannesburg. Between 40 and 60km outside the city and a pre choosen point, the new HK are dropped off, tarred and feathered, made drunk and left cable tied somewhere without any money or a phone or anything... You are warned that HK look after each other. And then the old HK drive away...

So basically, you get out of the restraints, you freeze for about an hour while getting sober as this goes down in winter. Then you make a fire and defrost for about an hour, and then you start walking...

I suppose there is a reason I don't like hiking...

Personal

Serenade 2003

As with any proper varsity RAU use to have an internal serenade contest where all the houses on campus competed for the honor of best serenade group. As always there is a lot of politics involved, there is a underdog and the group most lightly to win.

In 2003 a fried and I coordinated Kanniedood's serenade group. At that point a program similar to napster but with some changes for legal reasons was very popular on RAU. I used both the internet and Kazaa, the program mentioned, to do research on who was doing what in a'capella music around the world and some of the stuff found was very popular in Kanniedoood.

In the years leading up to then Dromedaris who had won in previous years were doing Karma Chameleon, the Boy George song and a group in America, Cornell University's Cayuga Waiters were doing the same. Exactly what the intellectual property implication of this is, I don't know but Cayuga Waiters also did a traditional African song so I wasn't to worried about it.

We were working closely with Thomas that year and he came up with a a'capella version of what's new pussycat, I suspect because he knew about this Cayuga Waiters / Dromedaris gray area.

Anyway we ended up getting second place in the internal contest and Dromedaris went through to nationals where they won and to this day I still don't know how that happened.

For the African song click here

For the Boy George one click here

Sangfees 2003

A lot can be said about this event that I coordinated. It won, it was hell and so on and so forth. Here is my version. In 2002 I met the HK member I had to work with in 2003. We had a fling and I asked her out. She cheated on me and I sent her to hell, well for a year basically. See Benjimin's HK have the title of Minerva. This work I believe comes from the Greeks essentially it a which.

I'll be honest in six years at varsity I never met someone like this girl and after six years at varsity I sort of forgot the golden rule when dealing with this house, Benjimin. The whole of 2003 I felt like a monster for sending this girl to hell. We weren't dating, she made no commitments and I felt horrible. So when we had to work together I gave her a CD with music on as a piece offering. This music wasn't for public use and it was bought so as far as I know, no law was broken.

I pretty much went through hell for three weeks. If she wasn't in love, she was angry, if she was't angry she was sad and so on and so forth. With all this she would be one way in front of everybody and quite another with me. In that time I was very wary of the situation because Benjimin's Primaria Elmarie van Zyl-Kotze was friends with a girl I knew from school. This girl Lousie van der Molen saw me kiss another Benjimin girl in 1998 and was very upset, that this happened. Because I know how she thinks I wasn't sure in 2003 if all this drama was due to the event in 1998 or what happened in 2002.

Long story short. Three days before the end of Sangfees 2003 I walked out. I couldn't take the abuse anymore

Lets fast forward a couple of months. Studies are over and I am working at Red screen right after an incident in Discovery holdings. One afternoon I buy the FHM and here this Minerva is. Lindsay Heatcote. Speaking of a blond and a brunette. I went to see her in the hostel and she let me in. With this I thought that all the drama was because of 2002. Any way we fought a bit, not physical, verbal. She said things and I retaliated. Before the end I got up and left. The next day I tried to go and see her but couldn't and three months later I proposed. Now before I could give her a ring my family due to Datasolve and another person I organised a job for (Karl Zwonnikoff). Locked me up in a mental hospital. She never gave me an answer and I always wondered. Last year after hearing certain things I decided to take the ring to her father and try and explain the situation. I also told him that if I was able to help him in someway after all this I would. Lindsay said that she didn't want the ring. This would imply that all that drama was because of a kiss that none of those girls ever saw. I say this because Lindsay never gave the ring back.

Rudi Bingle

The year was '98 and all engineering students reported for class. All of us excited and ready As first year I made a friend in studies. Rudi Bingle. He never drank, or swore or said anything bad about females, even if they deserved it. That year we did a couple of tasks together and got to know each other. He was alway on my case for being so direct and I always told him not to be so shy with girls.

The end of '99 there was a year end function in the house... The "Doring boom denee" and all of us except Rudi wanted to go. My plans was with a Skoonveld girl Donay Torr, Casper well he always had plans and all the rest of the crowd. Rudi wasn't, I asked him why and he told me about this Amper-Daar girl he liked but couldn't get the nerve up to ask, he was to scared, I told him that he was one of my friends, and and popular people and he should go to Amper-Daar and ask her. He laughed and did and to his surprise the girl was over the moon to be invited. The plans were made and all of us left for Usambara...

That night a lot happened. The YMCA, the make yourself aero dynamic 100 meter dash, a lot of dancing and flirting, smiling and good times. And then the end... Rudi came up to me and said "kideo your a friend, thanks for making me ask her..." He asked if he should wait for me so we could drive in a convoy back to RAU. I told him to bugger off and said that when you have a hot date you don't drive in a convoy. Donay and myself left shortly after them.

Outside the gate of Usambara there were no lights, but far ahead in the road four car head lights shone and a something was burning. Something was wrong and I had a very hollow feeling. I drove there it was on route back to Varsity and as I got there a Corsa smashed into a very small shape. When I saw the car I knew. It was Rudi.

Vidd my HK and a guy that was taken to court for sexual harassment because he never keeps quiet about anything. Was quiet. deadly quiet. Casper a very smooth ladies man was going crazy and Donay could not stop crying. I have been angry in my life a couple of times but nothing like that. When looking back now I think I held on to that for to long.

In 2001 I wrote a play based on an old Egyptian myth. This was a pretty dark play but at the time I was trying to make sense of quite a few things in my life. The two houses who performed the play were Kanniedood and Amper-Daar. Both these two houses had a role to play in the accident two years prior.

After the play completed I had a chat with Donay about it and she pointed out that the first years involved in this play did not know the people from back in 1999 and that being in it could affect them adversely.

By then I could do nothing but try and minimise the damage that could be caused. I also felt that later generations to the house of Kanniedood could benefit from remembering Rudi as I did.

At one of the last HK meetings of that year, I proposed a trophy to be given annually to a house member who showed the most enthusiasm and spirit for house events. This trophy was to be named after Rudi, who always competed with enthusiasm. I was shot down by the Prim of that year (Carel Cronje) and there was not much to do after that.

In 2002 I received my degree in the formal house ware I wore as HK. This was done in part to make sure Amper-Daar first years don't get the wrong impression of that play and more importantly to remember my friend on a very important day....

Candice de Bruin

A girl with confused hair. A good heart and a sometimes over active libido that got her into trouble... In 2003 she was SRC, dating one of my friends at the time Drickus Venter also known as Akoesties or Kwassie. I think it was round about July she had a fling with some or other bloke in a club and Drickus found out. He was devastated. His mother had also died in that time and the look on his face when he found out was devastating. I think they broke up after that and that would have been ok but then

A short while after that all of us heard that she died in a car crash. For the people who cared about them, the mood was down We did what we were supposed to do or tried rather but the joy of being a student was gone in that time. Of course I had my own troubles with the Minervas in that time. I think I didn't want to believe what I know now. Photo's, flings, stories... When thinking back I'm pretty revolted at the outcome of it all. Anyway for me that time was very difficult.

Candice passing on the way she did. Brought back memories of Rudi... The feeling I had then killed me, it really did. Being there for six years and knowing stuff like this I remember looking at all the third years. So arrogant, so righteous and wanting to through up. I stopped studying then and there...

Law and order

All of us have someone in there family that just well, ticks their wick. This is true for me as well. I have a brother in law. Someone that married into the family who thinks that he knows exactly what I think and who I am. Given he is a Doctor but in my experience no one can truly know another person in such a way.

Now my brother in law has done quite a view stupid things in his life. Some of them include pitching up at my flat to have me escorted to hospital without any reason except me throwing away drugs that really don't do anything and just detach you from your life.

Anyway. I used to keep quiet about this type of thing for my sisters sake but when she started doing it I decided to speak out.

Recently I have been thinking about this whole delusion thing about my family and started wondering if the Doctor wasn't thinking that I am to lenient about the happenings in the family by keeping quiet about these things.

See on numerous occasions either my sister or brother in law have violated my rights as a citizen. I'm not a lawyer but I know that much. So given these two realisations I decided to tell my side of the story.

The current thinking on my part would be that my sister and brother in law need a child to occupy them and keep them out of my life but to be a 100% sure of this I'll wait and see what happens when my sister gives birth to her first child.

But getting back to the story in the past 5 years my brother in law and sister have had me locked in hospital 3 times. Two of them happening from my place of residence with them actively coming to find me after happenings in a company. The stories would be the Deloittes story and the MTN ones.

Now I suppose that you might say that given my diagnosis I might have acted funny. Only I was outraged about what happened and didn't once act aggressively in the situation towards the company.

My sister and her husband also didn't ask my side of the story but just showed up with a police escort and had me locked up. This sounds a bit scary and it is believe me but as far as I've been able to tell, if the police have a choice between escorting someone to hospital and maybe having a worse situation on there hands. They escort. Sometimes even breaking the law in doing so but this is SA so...

After a massive fight with my family about this I have received assurances that it would not happen again...

Time will tell I suppose.

Contradictions

It's almost halfway through 2013 and I find myself once again facing a problem in life caused by the field of medicine.

Eight years ago I was diagnosed with Schizophrenia, an illness that runs in the family and as is a well known fact has got a genetic factor. Not that I know how Psychiatrist know this as when you ask them to test your DNA they say it's impossible.

Before I continue I would like to state that if anyone has been in a position to see and deal with people who have this illness the first thing you would realise is that people with Schizophrenia are all different. Some are violent, some are catatonic, some seem normal and some seem normal until they tell you they want to kill Jews because a voice is telling they are the reincarnation of Hitler. It's not exactly what Hollywood shows us in the movies.

Anyway. Getting back to the story. Eight years ago I had a situation in a corporate company in South Africa. Discovery Holdings.

In 2004 the year prior, I had a contract with one of the contracting houses in Discovery Holdings. While doing my work in this contract I noticed certain things on my computer. Stuff like IDE settings changing on there own and routing tables on my computer also changing from day to day. So I investigated. Using commands like netstat, running programs like Ethereal (In non promiscuous mode) and also checking up on processes in the Task Manager. I determined that there was a hacking culture present in the company.

I reported this and after about two weeks got retrenched. This was after the Contracting house (Datasolve) bought my student loan from ABSA two months prior.

The situation I was facing in 2005 was to get a payment schedule for the R36 000 I owed this company who at that stage broke all ties with me. After I one day went to there offices to try and get this schedule, they contacted my family who had me committed and on the word of the Contracting house claimed that I was delusional about hacking in Corporate companies and was paranoid about computer networks. This I read on a report that was handed to me. At that point I had no actual proof about my claims as all were given to management at Discovery Holdings so I was stuck.

Life went on and because of report I basically threw away drugs that in any case made me feel worse than normal.

Now six years later, at the end of 2010, I was working in another corporate company. MTN and during my work there similar things started to happen with IDE's routing tables and other computer software. This time though I didn't report anything before I got this evidence to myself away from the company.

A similar scenario played out only this time it hacking and evidence were not only handed in at hospital but sent to the police as well.

Two and a half years on after living on the street for six weeks because I didn't want to take money from the government after a doctor openly admitted he lied on the form required by Government to get the money, not wanting to address the problem I brought into hospital. I found out that this same doctor is now telling people that because of what happened to me I now maliciously hack and do damage and shouldn't be trusted with passwords on computer systems. This has been said without any computer forensic evidence

Now I don't know whether he is speaking of what happened in 2010 / 2011 in hospital combining that with the hacking that got me there in the first place or whether he was referring to eight years ago. It makes no difference logically and here is why.

In logic if you want to proof or disproof a statement there are certain rules that need to be applied. For instance you can't make a statement and then at a later stage contradict what you said even if evidence leads you to that conclusion. If this happens the first statement was wrong.

Now looking at my case this is exactly what happened. If today I'm a malicious hacker that would imply that I know what is going on in the hacking world. It would also imply that I have shared my knowledge about computers and hacking with fellow hackers and that I received information on hacking from other people.

Keeping this in mind and realising that I have an academic record that proofs that I knew all about hacking before I got diagnosed. It is hard to believe that I picked these skills up while working and being in hospital.

Thus the only logical conclusion would be that medicine made a mistake eight years ago I suppose as always the lesson to a man is. Go for the girl but that is another Philosophical topic for later...

For a formal explanation on proof by contradiction see here

Side effects

A lot of people today speak of side effects.

Software did something unexpected as a side effect of a faulty component or a girlfriend dumped her boyfriend as a side effect of miscommunication.

In my experience all these are valid, there is however some situations where the side effects are worse and a lot of the time nothing is done.

Given conditions in S.A. Quite a few things can be said about the government and service delivery. I mean internationally people have heard about Marikana and how the S.A. Police force slaughtered miners there in 2012.

Once a month you hear about riots that where caused by lack of delivery and of course a couple of years ago medical doctors went on strike for reasons of money in this country of ours. All these can be considered side effects of a broken system.

The only place things seem to function in S.A. Is in the private sector and there too are problems. Now as fate would have it, I find myself on a strong Psychiatric drug. Personally I find that it keeps me calmer than I normally am. I can't really say that it influences my thoughts in any way but it does temper my emotions.

Before I continue I'd just like to point out that I've never been violent towards anyone and my diagnosis as such was due to misinformation on the side of a company called Datasolve supplying only parts of truth to better there footing in a situation.

This is common practice in corporate companies and is one of the evils all of us face in trying to provide for our selfs and our loved ones.

When dealing with Psychiatry you quickly realise that it is not quite the science depicted on CSI where quantitive evidence is looked at and conclusions are drawn. In the U.S. Today there is a movement called Psychiatric survivors movement that takes a stance against what some Psychiatrists do. I myself have dealt with Psychiatrists that thing they are above the law overlook certain basic human rights in there treatment. In the same breath I'd like to point out that I've seen patients do exactly that towards doctors and that the situation isn't as easy as one would hope.

Of course these drugs given by these doctors don't always help with the perception of these doctors. Believe me if your skin burns like fire for two or three weeks, if you start feeling like a extra on the set of world war z, or maybe you arm or leg starts spasming on it's own, yes these side effects taint your view on what it is that these people are trying to accomplish and you start realizing why it is that some people call themselves survivors. Either way it doesn't really make a difference because all the normal people you know look at you differently. They have a firm believe that these drugs are good for you and sometimes have interventions in illegal fashions to keep you on them.

This is the plight of a lot of people around the world and in my opinion it fuels anger in patients not so much because of the suffering but because the first thing a Psychiatrist says to your family and friends when they see you again is that you went of your medication because of the illness. No compassion or understanding for the most part.

I suppose it's like all other aspects in life, there is always an agenda. What exactly it is I don't know but I can't believe that doctors can be this stupid.

Grendal

Yes, everyone has heard of the ledgend of Beowulf, old English poem and all...

Honestly, I'm really not sure how I get myself into these situations...

Let me tell the story...

Almost three years ago I started working at my current company, met a few people and life went on. The company is a technology company serving the needs of an international travel management client and is family owned.

Not all members of this family are management though, and in what I'm doing here, I need to mention that the management of both companies are very fair people...

This being said however, as with all families there is always a bad apple and unfortunately, I made the mistake of giving this bad apple a chance at friendship...

Demitri Christofeldis, is from what I've seen, a psychotic drug addict that I believe causes more problems for his family that what's needed.

The only thing he cares about is finding a place to do drugs, I had to ask him to leave my home when he wanted to smoke pot at it...

You know all things considered, I really have enough problems and don't need to get involved in that, what angers me though is he has a sister who works herself to death... Providing for two little girls.

A single mother who I believe is forced to take care of her drug addict brother...

This guy screws around at work, and has caused problems for so many people...

People always think money solves all problems, I doubt that is true... Take her situation for instance, if she sends her brother to rehab, her mother who is very fond of him will be angry.

If she doesn't in a couple of years her daughters will be teenagers and may end up experimenting with drugs because of her brother...

My problems seem small in comparison...

Professional

MTN (24/08/2011)

This morning I check snail mail and I find this letter from MTN dated the 08/08/2011. It states that I owe them money and that I discussed this with then . Now to be honest I did have a conversation with MTN personnel but, The amounts shown on the letter have nothing to do with the conversation. So I tell the lady before I pay anything I want to see where the get there numbers from. Obviously she decided that this was an opportunity to make even more money and tells me that if I want that information I need to pay for it. Only thing is they never sent me an itemized billing statement and the phone call was recorded.

Speaking of that phone call , I was angry because they cut of my line because I paid my account cash and not as normal by debit order and there "state of the art system" on witch I redesigned integration components, didn't pick the payment up. The woman on the phone had the nerve to tell me that I owed them 68 rand on the account and she asked when I was going to pay them. This is all fine. If I owe the money I owe the money but today the letter said I owed something like 250 rand. I really don't know how MTN makes money with a computer system like that. Then again if you guys look at my CV and why I left EAI there is something to say for people who sit and do there work and people who stuff around on other peoples computers. I don't know maybe Vodacom is the better choice.

 

MTN (29/08/2011)

Cell phones, cell phones, cell phones... In the past four days I have heard 4 different values that I owe MTN. I have received letters stating values that I never agreed to. I have no idea how that company is so successful. What inspired me to write this entry was the last straw that broke the camels back.

Today I requested a billing statement to see what I owe the company. After receiving it I saw that they were charging me but not stating for what. Don't get me wrong I don't mind paying for a service I used. It just irritates the hell out of me when a service provider can't show what was delivered.

Now I suppose I could get paranoid and wonder about everything that happened there last year but this is more a situation of incompetence in my opinion. The question in my mind is how can they send out a bill with numbers plucked from the sky and expect a client to take them seriously. If anyone has had a similar experience with them. Please pop me a mail as this situation is out of control in my opinion. I 'll let you know what happened.

Update (29/08/2011)

After trying in vain to get information from MTN call center personnel... MTN uped the bill by R700-00 and they still can't give me a breakdown of service. I don't know everything but considering that EAI works on there critical billing system. I don't trust these guys anymore

Update (29/08/2011)

Below are the statements and other communication I received from MTN. Have a look guys nothing correlates. I have no idea what I owe them. When I phone 808 for the voice service to find out what I owe. It gives me yet another different number. Watch out for corporates they always step on the little guy and people are to afraid to question.

The MTN active site on my account on 29/08/2011

Click here for itemised billing statement for 29/08/2011 and notice the different numbers between the totals on the MTN active site and the itemised billing site. Also notice that the total isn't the sum of the specified values...

Watch this space still scanning stuff they sent me on 08/08/2011. The thirty days overdue values on that documentation and what is on MTN active differs as well.

Above is page 1 of a communication I received from MTN yet the numbers they gave me on it were incorrect. If the recorded call is ever played back there is no mention of the monies shown here. Page two below shows the amount payable on the 08/08/2011 and that was discussed with me. The other amount never mentioned.

Deloitte (27/08/2011)

On the 24th I was contacted by Deloitte for work opportunities. I was shocked as big companies don't really do this sort of thing. Normally you work through these horrid recruitment agencies. Anyway I gave them the information they requested. They asked me about rates and so on and so forth and I started wondering. See All y’all know about Lindsay and the proposal and the whole sad story. What you don't know is that she became a CA at Deloitte. So what I did last night was I googled her name and Deloitte to see if anything pops out... This is what I found. Now I personally think she was acting in this movie, which in my opinion is a tad closer to propaganda than art. One thing is for sure. It going to be interesting

Update (29/08/2011)

I checked up on the person who contacted me Mr. Masuku and found his LinkedIn profile. He seems to be an Analyst. I'm still not sure how he recruits people for RMB, he says RMB is a client of Deloitte. Pretty interesting stuff. If you want to have a look at his profile... click here. I might be wrong given that I have no idea what a SLR analyst does but the question always was why would a company like Deloitte do recruitment, for what reason... I'll keep you guys updated on what happens with Deloitte.

Update (11/05/2012)

Anyway, said I'd keep all up to date on Deloitte's so here goes... I started the contract on 9/9 of last year and soon realized that I was right about the propaganda part of the story anyway... the whole thing began when I was placed at RMB... In the risk and compliance section. The director of the section Craig or as I knew him at varsity "Potato head" I believe was responsible for treating me with loosing my contract. There is a bit of history there as he was first year in 2001 when I was HK at RAU. Anyway at varsity he was a very quite person, never really participated in anything... That changed. After the architect Mr. Eloff of risk and compliance couldn't frustrate me by letting me do work other than java programming which my contract stated. Craig and a couple of his director buddies decided to openly threaten a girl in the office, I believe this was done to try and provoke a reaction out of me as I was trying to court her... After this girl publicly broke out in tears in the office. I was told that my contract was to ended... Before this happened there was the suspect monitoring of computers. It's true RMB has a policy on monitoring but I don't see 25+ people monitoring one contractor. Deloittes wanted to give me a seven day notice period right after this. When I didn't sign and tried to make sure that my anger about this event wasn't misunderstood I got threatened by there security guard a Mr. Wynand Pretorius. Somehow he got my 3g connection number and sent me smses over it... So much for right to privacy on top of that Deloittes asked me not to contact RMB which I ad heard to and up to date they haven't paid monies owed to me. This after Mr. Pretorius contacted my family and pithed up at my flat... In this time I found out that a girl I knew from varsity committed suicide and I booked myself into hospital. I got some happy pills and am back on my feet... I've got the screen shots and log files mentioned above... For the logs from RMB click here and of course the privacy issue below

SITA / ICT-Works / Deloitte (26/06/2012)

Hi all... I think this worth a read... I've been at SITA, placed there by a company called ICT-works... This company is all about black empowerment. Personally nothing against that. I think it's quite cool. What I'm not to fond about is that these guys wasted a month of my time And they didn't pay me when they were supposed to so... They got a contract from the government about five years ago to sort of computerize government processes. I set up a little test. I did this because I found out that ICT-Works and Deloittes had a partnership and that they were sending communications around about me. Also my contract with Deloittes states that 15% of my pay would be deducted and given back to me if I don't take leave. This never happened. See below. Given all the weird things that happen there. I didn't tell them about the Deloitte's dilemma until payday. It takes two days to transfer monies between banks and I should have received my money if they were going to pay me. As well, all weirdness was reported to management and nothing was done about it so... The funny thing here, is that my contract states that I should be payed on the 25th... It would seem that that didn't happen. As we all know... This complicates stuff. Given that I have proprietary information that belongs to them. Of course there are log files again. The application is a bit big. So not going to put that up but I have all these log files from a firewall ufw (Ubuntu Fire Wall) that I configured in SITA... And we all know what happens. this is here. Of course we have Deloitte's and last year with RMB and Berniece And now Deloitte's have a partnership with ICT-Works...

Update (04/09/2012)

Above I stated that Deloitte's was a partner of ICT-Works. I noticed today that certain pic's on the Deloitte's story went missing of the site. It wasn't me but the server password and the password used on the laptop at SITA were the same. I can't prove that someone stole the password there but I am thinking it. The SITA log files stayed up though so I can't be sure. It is very interesting though. Something happened there though.

Update (10/09/2012)

While in hospital I was contacted by Jo-Marie Momberg a lawyer representing ICT-Works. ICT-Works misinformed her on what happened two months ago On various issues including monies payed and property that was sold because of it. I stated to her that I was willing to replace a laptop and would give back / destroy my copy of the software I have of them but would like to keep the log files above so that this issue can be addressed by the law as it keeps normal people from doing there work. I cc'ed ICT-Works on this and someone from there contacted the doctor in hospital and told them that I threatened people. Below is the email concerned. Given the personal story on ethics and the fact that, that Dr. was to my knowledge contacted. I don't know if I personally believe it.

Home invasion (15 September 2017)

I've been in the industry for quite some time now, but even this is a first for me... A couple of months ago, my data usage at home started to ski rocket. At one point it was like two Gigabytes in 2 days and I had no idea why. For a while I thought cell c was stuffing me around. Then one night while setting up a new router, I realised that my network settings were way off...

At this point I sand boxed my mac and started analising network activity. The first thing I found was that my mac was making more connections than Paris Hilton did in her hey day. It was so bad that after a week of blocking specific IP's on http, I just blocked http all together. and only allow a router connection on that protocol. Everything else was pretty much blocked or massively restricted, Except for https.

In terms of https I basically added IP's that shouldn't connect to a blocked list.

For the Packet filter config file, see here

In doing all this I realised that there were massive gaps in API's used in the industry. I believe the whole range of AWS is blocked because of this. Also, it seems that at one point, companies like Cloudflare were connecting to my machine. This I find very interesting as the main goal of this company is to block hacking attacks and / or stop cyber threats.

The fact that Cloudflare was doing that does tell me the log files from packet filter logging spoofing attacks found here contains evidence of malicious criminal activity.

At this point I should stress that I'm not the one doing this...

As for https connections, the list of blocked IP's including Cloudflare can be found here

Projects

Disclaimer

None of the stories on this page are meant to discredit companies involved. Rather they are meant to point out a problem in the industry where a select few people are involved